How to Handle Betrayal in a Hostile Situation

This meme poses a powerful message that reiterates my blog post that only an “r” differentiates between a friend and a fiend which can be read here as sadly in life, it is friends, not enemies, that tend to hurt people the worst.

However, the line between an enemy and a friend is often more complex as it can become an ever-changing and a not so-easily-understood dynamic.  Further, certain situations exists where alleged enemies can work together for common objectives.

When Enemies Bridge Together

For example, two enemies can align to accomplish a common objective (think of God and Satan with Job), but remain divided in views (God and Satan are not friends per say). However, such parties will not be at war against each other and “bridge” for the purpose of completing a common objective (even God and Satan had intelligible and respectful conversations together). Going back to the Garden of Eden, remember that the serpent did not lie as he had mastered the art of deceiving even the truth itself, which paradoxically resulted in the fall of Earth according to Genesis, but even while this was transpiring, Eve and the Serpent engaged in intellectual dialogue.

Feeling Misunderstood

It should be taken in context that in most normal situations, enemies often feel misunderstand by the other side. In some cases, two persons will provoke negative reactions in the other based on similarities or being triangulated against each other by someone who has competing interests that sews the seeds of deception through untruthful facts that spread around through the medium of gossip. Thus, when “bridging” occurs between two parties who do not see eye to eye, all you know is that the two parties will be united until the common objective is at least reached with the future of the relationship unknown.

Keeping Friends Close

In a hostile situation, the saying: Keep your friends close and your enemies closer is another potential strategy that some may utilize. 

Isolation Strategy

When targeted by someone who you believe harbors ill-will,  a natural strategy is isolation from any and all weak or undeveloped friendships that involve mutality, viewing them more as liabilities than potential alliances until at least a requisite period of time had elapsed to make such determination of trust.

During the requisite period when on the radar with an enemy or someone who bears you ill-will, the sound of silence is also a very advisable strategy. As it can be hard not to have any interaction when you are going through an isolated period, remaining low key has never hurt anyone. However, if you try to weed out apples between good and bad, you may have your work cut out for you if you have not garnished a relationship with such persons prior.

A Friend Does Not Betray You

Clearly, any friend who would betray you was not a “friend” so to speak, so you must ask yourself whether the loss is that great (wouldn’t you rather know the truth or be sane with the illusion?).

In some cases, betrayal can be anticipated and navigated in accordance with the only unknown variable being related to time.

However, when there is an absence of direct communication, time constraints and/or rules that must be followed based on hierarchy or what not that prohibit or interfere with a bona fide relationship, no true relationship reasonably could be established or exsist and should be remembered for any one who finds themselves in the middle of an attack online or otherwise.

Thus during such time, any relationship one enters into should solely be for the sake of protection or sanctuary. To find someone who can offer such sanctuary, they have to have knowledge and/or skills and/or resources. Adopting someone with less knowledge than you poses the risk of dragging them in the middle of your chaos, which is not a loving thing to do and can make situations more complicated.

But here is truth personified: before you can even fathom to save another: you have to have effectively learned how to save yourself. There is no right or wrong way to save yourself – each person does what he or she needs to do in order to survive, and humans are limited by their own peripheral vision of how the facts manifested for them with little empathy to the other side of the spectrum. However, running to the rescue is not advisable when you yourself are in need of rescuing and thus, reinforces an isolation strategy.

Life is movement, but sometimes by remaining still, observing, learning, and being patient is, in effect, moving in the right direction as you observe life’s dance all around you.

 

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